If Gimmicks don’t seduce you

What to do in these Covid streets? Blog a precious event for #waybackwednesday that helps you remember the fun loving side of Event Consulting and not the outlandishly rude side of the industry.

One of the biggest misnomers of those that celebrate themselves or their milestones is, they’re vain and lack humbleness. They just want attention and portraying a life that is simply not real. While social media has added to that element in some of the worst ways, people’s desires for celebrations can’t be lumped. They don’t all stem from this narcissistic place we so easily place them in, just the same, they all aren’t insecure. You’d be surprised to learn a lot of my consultations include this one line, “I wanted to do A, but I don’t want to do too much” or “I really like B, but I don’t want the people to say is that what she’s giving ughhhh what would you do?” LOL.  My response is always around the same, there is a place JUST for you. Be the cool authentic you and you won’t have any regrets. It’s when you change it up that you fight through all those internal struggles.

I wish I’d figured this out when taking my senior pictures a few years ago…yes I said a few years, few being relative. I had this vision, ultimately it wasn’t me, but it was what I thought Senior pictures should be. I didn’t mind my outfit choices so much, I mean that’s how I dressed, it was that hair that I saw in a “Hype Hair” magazine that makes me lowkey HATE my pics. As my mother says, “the camera took what it saw”, Touché ma…Touché. I did this whole triangle part design with rubber bands in the front and FLIPPED MY HAIR UP in the back. I had been a flat wrap girl all my life, why I chose this style haunts me. I also let my other cousin do my makeup. It was ME, it wasn’t either of my cousins, the makeup was just not what I needed with the flip hair. Mannnn she lined my lips too. Which was on trend for the time, it just didn’t work. I look at those pics and think, “WHY LAWD?”often. You’ll see them and think they weren’t thaattt bad, and tis true, I just wish I would have gone with my normal, just spruced up a tad. I did a complete overhaul. Lessons.  

If you’re private and chill, you do NOT have to abandon that. If gimmicks don’t seduce you, be dope in your own way. Baby showers can be simple…and they can start in the morning. Mommies have 1-3 baby showers by the time showering is all over. Sometimes for all of their inner circles….work, church, friends, in laws, it takes that many logistically. If people want to love on you and host a baby shower in your honor, let them. After all, you KNOW you need the items because it takes a village then some for these lil crumb snatchers. Hopefully they won’t all be over the top, unless you like that sort of thing. A kitchen, dining area, and living room served as the perfect location for this baby shower. Since she was having 2, I thought it fitting to theme it “Buns in the oven” and serve buns, along with other tasty breakfast treats. ¡Alert Alert! Budget Saver, Carb overload and not a single complaint. Sometimes the sweetness is when you don’t try to overshare to build your brand in secret revenge and envy for likes. Just be.   

travel ‘round the world

Hey ya pals!!!

 “Thank you for being a Fran…travel ‘round the world and back again tah do do”…. some of my friends are the very BEST when it comes to sliding my information and you have to know I certainly appreciate that. In one week I’ve had 3 of my friends approach me, asking for my contact info because they KNOW of someone that just got engaged. Lol. I just pray they don’t make me sound super thirsty or make my potential clients feel like I drum up business on the regular. Before you make a face…see I imagine it to be when you’re 18 and on mom’s insurance AND get your FIRST speeding ticket. You can hardly process before those attorneys are sending “tattle tale” letters to your house. MAN. I know this has happened to y’all. Lol Memories. Anywho…I just hate to be that type of attorney. I’d like to be the attorney that is sought after just a tad. Referred to if you will. However, realizing I still have DUES to pay to the “game”…I guess I’ll take them how I get them. Honestly though, the clients I get that way tend to be super flakey and the way my time is set up, I can’t do flakey. Sooo I’ve just been encouraging my friends to please please please don’t bombard your coworkers and friends with my info. Don’t make me TACKY.

Wondering what to do when you first get engaged???


Do...

*Call anyone that would be offended if they first saw it on SOCIAL MEDIA!!

*Apparently post a picture on your social media…quickest way to alert everyone in one swoop…make those GAG…and let everyone that passed on you reevaluate their ENTIRE life.

*Get that ring sized…how would it look if you lose it and you JUST got it?

*Get that ring insured…for when you need that quick insurance scam, I mean honest pay out.

*Thank BAE every day for two weeks!!

DO NOT….

*Try to set a date the same day you get engaged-I promise you aren't 100% sure just yet.

*Start looking for a planner the very next day, even though you really feel like you need one THIS QUICKLY.

*Listen to all the people that will offer unsolicited advice as soon as they find out without a COINT to give you.

*Pick a petty fight with BAE…they are in the clear for 30 days.

 

I think that’s a banging list…lol

~xoxo

 

speaking of crazy RAZY

Greetings!!!!

You know when it’s been far too long since you last reached out to a dear friend and instead of acknowledging that fact…the friend just begins a conversation like ain’t nothing happened? Yooo I HATE that. So I’ll say….after much anticipation and many many threats to blog again…I’m bizack. Oh and how befitting given Bey (or me as some people commonly confuse us –I luh my frans-they are fools for texting me Congrats-lol) announced she’s preggars with TWINNIES. Quiet as it’s kept, I saw a facebook comment that said “Congratulations to Beyonce on her first pregnancy” lol. Lissen Folks soo very very shady…I did chuckle slightly and then gave a death stare to my phone after reading it.  I was talking to my deuce about it…so funny (but not really AT ALL FUNNY ugh) that after side chicks, side kids, diss tracks, manipulation into island purchases and a multi-million dollar wedding vow renewal ceremony…somebody managed to get knocked upppp. Just reaffirms that no amount of money, BEAUTY, or stardom keeps you from missing the BULL ish. Crazy razy.

Anywho…speaking of crazy razy. I have a wedding coming up in September of 2017. I have yet to put my finger on the contract….BUT during my initial consult…the bride said they have some funny requests. I expected to hear the usual…instead I heard some very interesting requests.

*The Grand Piano cannot be moved.

Ahhhh so it’s heavy…I wasn’t going to try, but y’all can’t move it? For the COINT? Really? Where is a down trustee or deacon when you need one? I know there is a side room…choir room…that it can be stored in. Don’t play with me!

*Photographer cannot intrude the altar or front of church.

Yo…I get this. The altar is sacred. But ahhhh we’re no longer sacrificing lambs at the tabernacle…we free. Holy Spirit done be unleashedddd lol. I kid…I do get it. It was funny because avoiding a potential block to the guest’s view is usually a request of the couple…not the church!

*Event Planner is responsible for phone patrol.

Wait Wait Wait….Wheetttt? Meeee? This was eye opening. Again I get it…but that’s usually a request of the couple, not the church. If the couple is completely okay with having their day plastered ALL OVER social media BEFORE the wedding pics officially come out…who is the church to shut it down? Interesting…can’t say I’m mad. I look forward to rolling up on people like “PHONE away or you’ll have to exit the premises”. Maybe I should hire help…the sneaky ones always snag the pic. I can’t begin to tell you how many concerts I’ve been to that clearly state “no phones” and yet I have evidence that I was there. SMH. What if this wedding is my karma and everybody TRIES me??? This is about to be hilar. I shall start practicing my “Moma eyes”…although I’m told I already have it in the bag.

 

~If you don’t PUT THAT PHONE up (insert harsh tone) xoxo

Grandma and Auntie always need ANOTHER BAG!

Do you find yourself searching for last minute wedding destination favor with a month to go before the nuptials? Is the struggle real???

Some of my typical go tos are candles, wine stoppers, labeled bags for the candy bar, personalized letters written by you on luxurious stationary and keychains...

But have you thought about luggage tags? Decently nice ones with all your personalized ish on them?

What about a canvas or vacation tote...personalized. It can say as little or as much as you want and are willing to pay for. Options are truly endless and you know Grandma and Auntie always need ANOTHER BAG! It could be a big emblem Letter...just the 1st letter of your new last name and that's it for the simple look as well as the low low in price. If you wanted a bit more...You could keep the personalized info in a smaller font which saves your coint but also makes the bag user friendly to a lot of people. It doesn't have to say PAULETTA (needed a random name and Denzel and Pauletta are on my bedroom floor on the cover of Ebony lol) all big on it where folks would say, "it's nice but I can't use THIS"...you can have Denzel weds Pauletta 2015 until forever blah blah real discreet on the bag somewhere.

You could even put together a travel kit inside of the personalized tote. Sometimes I encourage brides that have several out of town guests to put together lil kits. Your kit may include sun screen and lip balm etc...of which you can personalize alllll that jazz too.

What about putting notes in a bottle...kind of like a SOS that would typically be found in the ocean. You could roll up a letter that has your engagement pic also...it can be nice and generic or written specifically with each guest in mind. Engrave the bottle if you're really about that life. Gone head...do it up.

Stuck on the candy bar?? Engrave a cute lil box for the candy bar. Make sure it's a pretty sturdy one so that people can use it to hold their candy at the reception instead of that dreaded white paper bag...that box can be used for something else when they get home. Multipurpose.

You can pretty much get anything engraved and it could serve as your guest's trinkets or paperweights. A flip flop, a cruise boat, beach towel, palm tree etc. TOTALLY ENGRAVE-ABLE. For the more discreet approach, flip the item to the back and engrave Denzel and Pauletta 2015.

Wanting to step it up and CASH OUT?  Try glasses. Your guests will be toasting with your favor for years to come...or until they drop. Is that just me? I don't have a full set of anything because I stay breaking something. lol.

Don't be the couple that grew tired by the time favors were discussed and just dropped the ball. You can get a lot of stuff done locally and quickly. There's always time...

~Peace

“You ready Bey?” “Let’s go get ‘em.”

Greetings

Last year strategically placed me in amazing standing for 2015. You never know who is watching you work or whose ears are free of wax and waiting to hear how you’re developing.  Last year in Boston, during what I consider the BEST concert of all times… one of my faves THE Mrs. Karen Clark THE Sheard  reminded me of this very scripture, “A man’s gift makes room for him, and brings him in front  of  great men” (Proverbs 18:16). Okay so this is not going to be a Holy Ghost filled post…but ahhh DASSIT! Powerful stuff.  I’m quick to forget that I have been empowered to make room for myself. My gift (which encompasses so much more than “talent”) will open doors of opportunity if I continue to delight myself in the ultimate giver…the one that gave his begotten son.  I could probably spend a few pages on that…but I won’t. lol.

So I’ve been doing an extreme amount of venue and vendor consulting. I arrange the interviews, we pick the lucky winner, and I’m out. This works well 90% of the time. My top 3 favorite events  since I’ve blogged  have been an 80s themed party, an 1 year olds lady bug themed party, and an engagement party.  The 80s themed party had real life break dancers and printed pics as favors. The 1 year old actually had onesies made that read “LENA BUG” over the cutest graphic of a black and red lady bug; her name is Elena. The engagement party was enchanting…from the candlelight to the amazing words spoken by those closest to the couple. It’s always my honor when people entrust their events to me...it’s like a quick marriage where I spend the majority of my time proving I’m worthy of their love.  Oh but once it’s proven…I’m in there forever and they refer me to their loved ones. That’s the BEST place to be.

I recently hired a vendor for my own 30^th celebration based on a reference. It was going good until the increased price. I ate it because, well, I was on limited time and at the time I thought it included more things than it actually did. I was excited to give this particular vendor a chance because I knew I needed some new blood in this line of work. CAN YOU SAY I was handled awfully? I’d shown myself polite in doing a favor, as I often do, because in real life I provide a service and it’s hard to put a value on every single thing you do until the very end. Not everyone understands that tipping for a service is customary, so you do favors here and there because you know you’ll get it back in the end. Pay if forward if you will. Well honey…after receiving some rude texts and some things I could have probably gotten out of…I paid in full and concluded to never use this vendor. How unwise it is for a vendor to mistreat a client…you don’t know their reach. Everybody is on their hustle and references are golden.  Who I won’t work with again is…well…you get the point. The world turned and as life would have it some newborn blood did recently develop in that same month (insert praise hands). I’d take a less experienced person with raw talent ANY day. In fact, that excites me. They work that much harder…they’re HUNGRY. Grrr. Heck I’m hungry too so let’s get these stacks together. “You ready Bey?” “Let’s go get ‘em.”

~xoxo

fabrics, and gown shapes and veil lengths...OH MY!

I was having an in depth conversation with a young lady this past weekend and it occurred to me…unfortunately she has no idea HOW to describe her perfect wedding dress. The vision has come together in her head but it’s having a hard time doing much else...No shade!  In my experience the most commonly confused dresses are the fit and flair and mermaid….Yes so there is a difference if you were unaware! Wedding dress shopping introduces you to new fabrics, gown shapes, veil lengths, dress lengths, embellishments, types of waist styles, sleeve options…like honestly it can be quite confusing! Your wedding dress is one of the MOST important garments sooo it’s important that you get a handle on the terms!

·        A-line -- A fitted bodice that has a modest flair in the skirt, A-line wedding-dress designs are among the most popular sold today. This is a universal classic that suits almost any body type from the curvy chicks to the skinty ones…

·        Ball gown -- This is the fairytale princess dress style you remember from Cinderella, Lady Diana, and Grace Kelly's ceremonies. It has a long, flowing skirt and a fitted bodice. It has lots of fullness, created with petticoats, hoops, OR too much crinoline…you get the idea.

·        Blouson -- Blouson designs are, as the name implies, blousy. They're gathered at the waist or an inch or two below. Not very popular!

·        Drop waist -- Flaunting either a loose or fitted bodice, drop-waist gowns add styling that accentuates the area just below the waistline or the waist itself. It looks the BEST on curvy women….gives those hips all the attention!!

·        Asymmetrical -- Dresses with features like one shoulder strap or layering that creates an uneven, spatial arrangement or silhouette.

·        Empire -- Distinguished by a high waist, hitting just below the bust. The empire styling elongates the body, minimizes pear-shaped figures and can conceal a disproportionately large or small bust. I like empire waist shirts because it’s freaking forgiving…so imagine what a good ole tight empire wedding dress can hide…WONDERS!

·        Mermaid -- Also called a trumpet or fishtail design, the mermaid dress hugs the body and begins to flair, usually at the knee. The flare can be modest or exaggerated. This design accentuates a woman's figure and shows particularly well on tall, athletic women. Although I love the mermaid…it can sometimes take the curvy bride, or the shorter bride a little longer to find a flattering dress in this style…

·        Mini -- A gown with a hemline that falls at or above the knee…Cocktaily!

·        Princess -- Created from unbroken vertical panels (that will suck you in), this style can take a classic A-line shape or have a more exaggerated flare. It's considered a slimming design that will suit most body types.

·        Sheath -- Unconstructed, long and slim, the sheath is body-hugging and doesn't have a fitted waist…not as forgiving!

·        Boat neck -- This style rests along the shoulder points, revealing the collar bone. It's also known as a bateau. Umm literally forms a banana boat around your neck…

·        Cowl neck -- Loosely draped fabric, styled either high or low at the neck and bust characterize this component

·        Drop shoulder -- A look consisting of bands or sleeves that start below the curve of the upper arm…nice shoulders and a good ole skinty collar bone are heavily accentuated with a drop shoulder!!

·        Halter -- The top is angled at a diagonal along the outer bust and neck to fasten behind the neck…has always seemed clubbish to me tho...

·        Jewel -- A neckline that follows the curve at the base of the neck and does not include a collar...always seemed Playboyish to me lol

·        Portrait collar -- This drop-shouldered look consists of a folded, sometimes exaggerated collar

·        Sabrina -- This style is characterized by a straight neckline beginning well inside the curve of the shoulder

·        Scoop neck -- This neckline can be daring or modest with this component but ends in a curve instead of a point.

·        Spaghetti straps -- A neckline characterized by very slender, supportive straps at the shoulder…some brides automatically go here for the support of their D’s…but a good strapless bra and good alternations eliminate the need!

·        Square neck -- This neckline has a horizontal line across the front of the bodice terminating in sheer vertical straps or shaping on either side. Viewed from the front, it looks like a cutout in the shape of a square or rectangle.

·        Strapless -- As the name implies, this look leaves the shoulders bare. This style is supported by the structure of the bodice...which is why I love a good strapless with a corset back...when you need support after one too many dances...it's there!

·        Sweetheart -- A component characterized by a curve over each breast to dip into a shallow or deep V like the top of a Valentine's heart. THE SINGLE most popular neck line…

·        V-neck -- This neckline is defined by the shape of a plunging or shallow letter V (my friend's kid that this will be my collar bc I love to show the girls...they don't know me AT ALL)

·        Ballerina -- At or just above the ankle

·        Floor -- Brushing the floor or slightly above…The most popular…

·        Hi-lo -- Also called an intermission hem, it hits at mid-calf in front and is floor length in back...not to say it can't be pulled off, but I've honestly never truly seen it done!

·        Mini -- Above the knee

·        Street -- Just covering the knee

·        Tea -- Terminating a few inches above the ankle

·        Bell -- Snug to the elbow and then flaring to the wrist

·        Capped -- Very short sleeves, closely fitted and slightly rounded

·        Dolman -- Joined to the bodice above the elbow and tapering to the wrist. Also called a bat sleeve

·        Kimono -- Sleeves extending into the main column of the dress and lengthening deep and wide to the wrist

·        Puff -- Gathered or pleated at the shoulder. Depending on the amount of volume involved, can include: Juliet, bishop, leg-of-mutton, balloon, poet and pouf

·        Three-quarter length -- Terminating between the elbow and wrist

·        Tulip -- Overlapping fabric that creates a series of petal shapes

·        Batiste -- A fine, sheer and delicate cotton or cotton/linen blend

·        Brocade -- A heavy, woven fabric with a raised or sculpted design, typically only worn during cool seasons

·        Chantilly -- A fine, mesh lace that often features floral designs outlined with silk threads….I appreciate this in a regular dress. It’s soooo CLASSY

·        Chiffon -- Sheer, mesh fabric that can be made from silk, cotton or polyester

·        Crepe -- Lightweight, soft fabric that appears slightly crimped or crinkled (Listen leave this to your tablecloths if you absolutely MUST have it)

·        Crepe de Chine -- A thinner variety of the crepe fabric described above

·        Crinoline -- A stiff foundation fabric that's used as an underskirt with a ball gown style wedding dress...I did a blog in the past about dying my crinoline...man I love THAT!

·        Organza -- A sheer, fine, translucent and textured fabric made from silk, polyester or nylon…you’ll find this a lot

·        Satin -- Shiny fabric that's usually very smooth and densely woven. It's available in many different weights and color….it’s thick enough to be forgiving but definitely wedding

·        Shantung -- Rough-textured woven silk or synthetic fabric that crushes easily

·        Taffeta – Reportedly, a high-end (don’t know if I’d characterize it as high-end), woven fabric with a slight sheen that's often reserved for fine garments (or rain coats in my opinion lol). It's available in two varieties: Piece-dyed taffeta, which is soft and often used as a lining material, and heavier, stiffer yarn-dyed taffeta used in evening gowns and wedding dresses.

·        Tulle -- Sheer, stiff mesh made from rayon, cotton, silk or nylon…one of my faves

·        Velvet -- A fabric with a distinctive pile, velvet can be made with silk, cotton or a number of blends. It's typically a cool-weather choice….I can’t think of a single time velvet should be the move lol

·        Voile -- Very lightweight, semi-transparent fabric woven from cotton, linen, synthetics and cotton blends

We mustn’t forget the veils…

·        Brush -- Short, just touching the floor

·        Court -- A little fuller than the brush style, train drapes starting at the waist

·        Watteau -- About the same length as a brush train, characterized by a single panel attached at the shoulders

·        Chapel -- Dramatic but still easy to handle, extends about 3 feet behind the bride

·        Cathedral -- Dramatic and formal, can extend 6 feet or more behind the bride

Learning key terms can assist you in wedding dress shopping. Trust, it’ll be far less frustrating for EVERYONE involved if you can describe what you like and what you don't!!!

Merry CHRISTmas…Happy Birthday Jesus month all…

XOXOXO

LaME wEdding Deejay????

Latest buzz?!?!?!

My assistance was needed to find a Deejay!!! (Go Deejay, cause that’s my deejay <----- do y’all remember when that song went SUPER HARD? Lol, I hope I’m not showing my age). Back to my client, the deejay will spin for the last 4 hours of a reception coming up in the middle of 2014.  When the bride springs for a live band, it can sometimes be hard to keep that momentum or even change the mood entirely for the PARTTAAYYYY! Honestly, a deejay can be one of the HARDEST vendors to choose… if they weren’t referred by an event planner (like meeeeee lol) then yeah, you could waste a whole LOT of money and be completely unsatisfied! Seeing as how I don’t want that to happen to my beloved couple, I thought I’d go ahead and agree to assist!

I ask this in ALL seriousness… Do you want your deejay to play ONLY what you’ve selected or do you want him to do HIS JOB and know what to play when? If you’re considering the first option, chile get you an iPod and hook it up to Bose! But if you’re considering the latter….remember you pay for what you get! I’ve witnessed a MESS (well haven’t we all?), a complete and epic FAILURE indeed! You see sometimes the couples have their own vendors they come to the table with, so yeah I can’t say anything! But be WEARY of white collar men moonlighting as a deejay and wanting to gift you THEIR services. Sometimes it’s just best to take that good ole gift card instead of their services…just saying. No shade! Lol

My client is only looking for a deejay…she didn’t ask for a deejay with a stage, who will emcee, have a live percussionist, snow machine, fog or lights. The average deejay is between $100-$300 per HOUR; it can definitely be more for a Saturday wedding as the couple is competing with other weddings as well as CLUBS the deejay may work at. Be sure to think about that! The deejays I’ve had the pleasure of working with are between $1250-$1950 for 4-6 hours.

I recommended after considering the client’s needs as well as who would be accepted at her venue… (drum roll please)

Dj Paradyme

www.coolreceptions.com

Joe Bunn

m.bunndjcompany.com

Mike Morse

Morseentertainment.com

Remember IT IS possible to ruin your wedding with a LAME deejay!!!

~Kisses