oH bAbY!!!

Q: What event is most fun to plan? A: A Baby shower for a proud mommy!

When the group you’re planning for is all fun, games, and baby jazz…things kick off without a hitch! Too many times people will side eye games and choose not to participate…Party Poopers!! When you’re surrounded by ecstatic people who don’t mind making a fool of themselves…oooo oooo! (well I just love love planning showers) Don’t tell anybody, but for smaller events, I’ve actually catered. Some wings, meatballs, and bbq weenies really top off a well planned event I must say! Sometimes I even incorporate my mom; I’ll ask her to buffalo the wings and when I go to pick them up, there will be double the amount in 3 different sauces. lol She’s so extra like that when it comes to that type stuff, but that’s a good thing and I celebrate it! PS-her 61st birthday was yesterday and she's still kicking!

Getting back...

Oh BaBy, the games…sniffing the dirty diaper, tasting the baby food, guessing how big around the Mother's stomach is….great laughs! There is one game I NEVER win…NEVER...it’s the clothespin game. If you’ve never heard of it, it’s the game where you can’t say “baby” the whole time you’re at the baby shower….yeah I always slip up and say it! Truly hopeless!

For a really NICE baby shower, you should average $17 per person….BUT that includes everything. Decorations, food, prizes, venue….if you multiply $17 by your guestlist, you should have more than enough money to fund your event. 2nd question, how long is this event…basically how long do you have to refill the fresh friut and keep the punch coming? That determines the budget because the longer you stay at a place, the more plates you eat! Come on now, you know it’s true…you let the first plate settle and then you’re back for round 2 before you know it (I know I'm not alone in this lol). I’ve done showers a lot cheaper, especially when the venue is free. I don’t recommend having events at your home by any means, but it just seems so cozy when you have showers there! I like the coziness of it all! The great big plush couches…the family afghan to lie across my lap!  Oh the Memories….

Ready to land this next baby shower contract I was contacted about last week….consider this putting it out there in the universe!

Lata alligators....

It’s Kah-sim-a-nee not Kiss-a-me

Hello gems,

For starters, did you know Kissimmee Florida is not pronounced Kiss-a-me? Haha I always thought and have always heard it pronounced that way! It’s so wonderful to have the correct pronunciation now! Learn something new every day right? The Mayor said it’s Kah-sim-a-nee by day and definitely Kiss-a-me by night!!! Umm that was Cute...for him :)

Listening to the attractions in Florida coupled with the Mayor begging people to visit…I thought about honeymOOns! Granted, this isn’t the first place you think of for lovers celebrating a new marriage…and you may be giving me a MEAN side eye right now because I’m trying to convince you…but follow me on this journey!  The mayor mentioned like 3 huge parks miles from each other-Sea World and Walt Disney World-can’t remember the 3^rd. Florida has nice weather, great food, and I’m sure there are spas and shows available! If you and your husband enjoy theme parks, water parks and the like…explain to me why this wouldn’t be absolutely perfect? I wish honeymooners wouldn’t give into people, and the etiquette of it all! Do what YOU want, regardless of how cheap and non-traditional it seems. A honeymoon is about consummating the marriage of course, but it’s the beginning of your lives!! Don’t begin your new married lives following tradition…taking a trip that you can’t afford, somewhere exotic, where you can’t find anything you enjoy doing. That doesn’t sound like a fun time to me.

I'm sad for those people that get “the look” when they say they are waiting to take their honeymoon. I believe that is totally okay and I wish the rest of the world would follow suit. After you’ve spent a lot of money on a wedding, most likely feeding people more than one course who didn’t bring a present…you don’t always have the money you’d like to take some grand honeymoon. Lately, I’ve been impressed, it seems to be the trend to wait on the honeymoon and instead pay for a wedding and a house! I can definitely dig that. Travel, vacation, and getaways are things you can do for the rest of your married lives… but building a full proof foundation you only get one shot! It’s so important to plan a wedding you can afford so that you’ll have the necessary funds when life happens. You need a place to live, reliable cars, and credit cards way below the credit limits. You need that far more than a honeymoon!! Finances are the number one reason for divorce, so let’s not start below the mark on finances out the gate-from the get go-from jump street (as my mommy says), to take a honeymoon. I wish everyone would just be smart about their decision making-attempting to please the joneses by taking one when you can’t afford it is pretty dumb. If you’re a couple that just has to have a honeymoon to feel married, cut wedding costs by having a simple wedding. But by all means don’t forfeit your future, your stable ground, for a wedding and definitely not for a honeymOOn!   

Tah-Tah for now….



Not that it matters lol BUT me in Kissimmee FL..notice the TAN!



ToO much sacrificE....

Greetings lovebugs...

How much sacrifice is too much sacrifice? I understand when brides play the compromise game with their grooms but not their cousins and in-laws! Far too soon it becomes what everyone else wants on YOUR day. If you don't have just a tad bit of "Bridezilla" you are sure to be ran over and unhappy when your wedding day finally arrives. The single thing I've heard most of all is...drum roll please...the Mother in law changing the guest list! I've never understood how the bride and the Mother of the groom can plan a guest list when it's the groom getting married right? Some Mothers are just naturally overbearing and need to have some say so...and that's okay but sometimes far is too far and they should stay in their Mother in Law lane (no offense)! If you aren't contributing funds, please don't add people nobody knows out of "respect!" Think about it, the Mother in law has more respect for people she doesn't have a relationship with than her own son and his future wife's wishes and checking accounts!! Where they do that at? It's amazing that nobody ever understands there is budget...adding as little as 3 additional people adds an additional table, linens, floral arrangement, and food!  If you continue to beef up the guest list, thus adding more stuff...well you saw Kim Kardarshian's wedding right? (Haha I made a funny)

There are some sacrifices that even I would make! I personally want a destination wedding but after thinking long and hard about it, I decided that I'd rather have my grandparents there! They are much older now and their health is a concern so if they are still living, I'll acomodate them! Sadly, I'm not looking to be engaged at this point until I'm well over 40...so I need them to hang out for another 15 years. I need their favor....they've been married over 50 years and I can't do it without them! Also, a big shocker I'm sure...I'd be willing to have a reception in his home state and a 2nd one in my home state. I'd be willing to plan them BOTH and then sacrifice 2 dresses for the occassions! All jokes aside, my biggest sacrfice and I encourage all brides to make it with me...I refuse to be a "people pleaser" to anyone but my future husband! If it upsets me in any way...my apologies but I'll have to decline and kill that noise...
~Me

Bride vs. Bridesmaids...The New Smackdown

Helloooo

I normally don’t agree on this subject with my older friends BUT today, I have to agree! I feel almost defeated for my entire generation! I’m sad to say that bridesmaids these days have NO IDEA compared to bridesmaids way back when! I was watching “Say Yes to the Dress: Bridesmaids” my level of disgust rose with each commercial break. This friend, and I do use the term loosely, said to the cameras and therefore the entire world, “I will only be a bridesmaid if I look good in the dress”. The poor bride only had 2 bridesmaids, her included! So the bride literally catered to this one bridesmaid the entire consultation. She made the bride cry with her antics and attitude…after every dress she would say things like “I guess I won’t be in the wedding then”…Umm Girl STOP! Sadly, bridesmaids are beginning to run the show and that’s not how it was intended to be!!!

2 years ago, I went to a bridal shower and I was so upset for the bride. It was in a restaurant, the decorations arrived after everyone had already taken their seat, and I caught the bride serving her own cake! It was beautiful for the simple fact that the bride’s family and friends were so affectionate and so happy and that showed through all the chaos… but let’s be honest the matron of honor should have done loads better! When you accept the bridesmaid position please know it will be expensive! Understand you are expected to show up to everything extremely chipper and ready to WORK! Call the bride and ask if there are things you can help with and then make yourself available. I don’t believe in neither the bride nor bridesmaids being side swiped by some huge bill or even huger commitment…but information is KEY! You all know I believe in emails...send one! Have a meeting, discuss the REAL! Give some quotes, pick out dresses and shoes and let bridesmaids know if you are a stickler for French tips and no tattoos showing! Once the bride properly disseminates the information…bridesmaids need to respect it and execute without a hitch! I don’t blame my cousin one bit, (she made one GORGEOUS bride) she had all men-ALL groomsmen on both sides of the church! Let’s be honest, all they needed was a haircut and a rented tux!!! Far less trouble, headaches and the like! LOL

~Jay

In ThE sTate of nC...I sTand CorrECTed

Greetings squirrels,

Of course THIS morning I'm trying to update my wedding budget because if you don't do this regularly, things will get completely out of hand quickly! Interestingly enough, under my Miscellaneous column (6.5% of the budget) line items Marriage License and Taxes appear. So I decided to do some research just so I could fill in the prices of these line items....marriage licenses are only $60. Umm why? That's a problem!! Maybe if they costed a tad bit more, people would take them more seriously. Think about it... if marriage licenses were $2000+, couples would really THINK before obtaining one. No fly by night weddings, "I think I love you". This is my first platform-this is my plan to end the high divorce rate...Vote for ME! lol

Blood tests and physical exams are not required to get married...WHY NOT? Right now, partners feel a sense of guilt asking for these tests and exams. As they ready themselves for marriage there should be 100% trust! I agree trust is important, but if tests and exams were mandatory...oh what a wonderful world it would be! Imagine no surprises, you'd go into the marriage with a clean slate! Unfortunately, many children grow up without one parent or both...coupled with 6 degrees of separation, we're all pretty much related! What better way to be sure your husband is not your 4th cousin than a blood test? In the state of NC cousin marriages are allowed!!! First cousins may marry, but double first cousins may not marry. Double first cousins occur when the couple is related through both parents. For instance, Ian marries Zoe and Ian's sister marries Zoe's brother. Their children are double first cousins and therefore can not be married in the state of NC. I have such a huge problem with this-it seems way off to me, I thought for sure this was illegal! But I stand corrected!!! 

Have a great day:)

That is so Ratchet....

We've all been invited to one or forced to be a guest at one....a ratchet wedding that is! You're either extra ready for the craziness to cease or you're ready to see the next jaw dropper! More than likely, I'm the one ready to see the next jaw dropper so I can say "OH MY GOSH...No she didn't!" I can not lie, the more horrible the event, the more I take in! Then I like to process so that I can be sure these things never happen at anything I'm apart of. I assume that's why I love them so much...it's the research! 

Last night my linesister called to tell me about her cousin's wedding....Umm (shaking my head already). She didn't want to gossip but I told her if it was FACT, it wasn't gossiping! So she went in....Why is timing such a huge issue for some? Why do people sleep late on their wedding day? Why do they rely on unreliable vendors who are always late to everything? If the make up artist was late and unprepared for the make up trials...she probably won't have it together on your wedding day-It's a given! It trickles...once one person is late or takes too long-the schedule is thrown off! This is why you pad the schedule with extra time for emergencies-pop ups-uncontrollable situations...

So this wedding's start time was at 3pm....at 3:30pm the guest were told, "we told y'all 3pm so that y'all could be here on time for the 3:30pm start time"....Wow, they tried it! It may have went over a little better had the wedding not started after 4pm and they used the same excuse (BE MORE ORIGINAL). So now it's "we told y'all 3pm so that y'all could be here on time for the 4pm start time." That is so ridiculous.  As if the start time drama wasn't sufficient, apparently the guests thought they were going to a "How Tacky can you get? costume party". The words flashy, gaudy, tight, loud, and most of all CHEAP were the words thrown out! You would think in 2011 you don't have to tell anybody how to dress for a wedding, the sad part is YOU DO!!!! 

I could go on forever about Ratchetness....but I won't! We could discuss when Pastor's don't have any couth, when dresses are way too tight, when the bridesmaids decide to do their OWN hair, when the bride doesn't provide a make up artist, when toes are hanging off the shoe, when the groomsmen are all way too drunk to stand before an audience, when the Mother in law should have gotten those micro braids re-done, when the flower girl uses the bathroom on herself and runs/cries to her Daddy on the opposite side of where she is suppose to stand, when the caterer cuts cocktail hour because you didn't pay him in full, when the photographer goes on way to many smoke breaks and guests don't want him close, when drop cords are as much of an accessory as decorations....like I said I could go on forever, but I won't!

Always
~Me

18 Seaboard

Greetings...

This weekend marked the end of the RSVP's for the engagement dinner! I have a new friend in Matt of 18 Seaboard! He's so timely with his emails and he'll work something out in a flash! I love people like that...you know the ones that make the world go round- springing into action!!! Let's face it, the lazy people do not make the world go round, they only slow it up (Yelp you heard it here first)! He's so descriptive and he'll add bullet points-OH MY GOSH how I love bullet points #clarity. I've only been to 18 Seaboard once and as you guessed with the seaboard, there are a lot of seafood dishes. I think I got a salad last time but it was good since I do not eat seafood. The ambiance is really nice-extremely modern and chic. We have a private room-we've already confirmed bud vases with fresh flowers, easel for the 18x24 engagement photo, personalized menus, and a section for the engagement roast! The menu is 3 courses with brisket as the highlight....3-5 choices for each course! The couple decided against alcohol...so all I have left to do is balloons, favor boxes, mini programs, and name tags!

Uh let me check on some things right now....

sHoRt LOOONNNGGG WHiTe or mIDniGHt...you must have one:)

Hi Lovebugs....

I LOVE wedding dress shopping....I could spend hours upon hours doing it. There are so many different kinds to choose from-different materials, fabrics, to sparkle or not to sparkle? Right, aren't you getting excited right now just thinking about it? I watch every season of "Say Yes to the Dress" and when I thought I'd finally met THAT GUY, you know the one I was going to spend the rest of my life with...I told him KLEINFIELDS was the ONLY place I would consider. He was fine with it... (obviously the dress was not our problem but that's such a long story LOL).

So my bride and I spent only one day actually shopping...#bummer But we'd looked at so many websites, seen so many wedding dress shows, and she had an expensive magazine full of wedding jazz that was AWESOME! So we were prepared...I armed her with great knowledge on the attire budget and we set out on a Monday! I could tell she was excited...her Mom had come down and her future Mother in law wanted to be apart. It was such a nice productive day, we'd had a meeting, decided on invitations, and now we were having a girl's day out!

 A boutique in downtown Raleigh actually expected YOU to pull their dresses and take them back (manual labor??)...but we all did! Imagine 4 people with 4 different styles and only 2 people (the bride and me) that understand there is a budget and it must be stuck to! So much!!! The bride is in excellent shape and curvy enough to look pretty awesome in every dress she tried on...thus making the decision even harder! We liked the dresses at the boutique but wanted to see more...so we went to Durham to the next appointment. Durham was interesting....they did it very differently, ie BETTER! We looked at magazines and folded down the corners of dresses the bride wanted to try on....but the wedding planner in  me sprang out MORE because we are on a budget people!!!! After being teased with the senseless "I mean wedding planner is this dress in budget?" over and over again I decided to be proactive. I went to the "off rack" and found some sale dresses that were "as is". No they didn't look great...but simple can be elegant and you'd be surprised what a seamstress can create! LOL I didn't win the battle obviously...and she stepped out in this number that was TO DIE FOR!

I teared up at the first glance of her...and I knew it was HER DRESS! But I also knew it was over budget and I was not going to remain quiet because as a planner I need to go on record and say this dress is completely out of budget while inside knowing she'll probably purchase anyway! (Major run on sentence lol) The dress will be ordered this month and back for alterations in November!!! I'll have to work it (knead it, flatten it) into the budget-reluctantly-because it is a beautiful dress and I know her new hubby will cry once she strolls down the aisle in it. Yes STROLL because there is no other way to walk in that dress...so WORK it Bride:)



My 2nd Favorite...she'll have on my 1st choice





Loved it!

~Until Monday...I think I'll take the sabbath off!

1 Picture says a 1000 Words....

Good morning love muffins,

Super excited this morning.....the photographer CAN make the engagement dinner!!!! Wheeew what a load off! Let me tell you, searching for an affordable photographer that also delivers quality work is slim to none! But I happen to know her work first hand because I hired her for one of my birthday parties and she's definitely talented...it's funny I met her my freshman year and I've given her business every since! Shout out to TOUCH STUDIOS!!!



Touch Studios



 Ironically, I can't remember how we became friends; I really feel it must have been Freshman English but I'm not so sure (but that's my story and I'm sticking to it). I do, however, remember my Sophomore year I asked her to make me a Ray Charles shirt. It was thebomb.com -it was a black fitted v-neck tee and Ray Charles was outlined in White with his name to the left. That's back when legendary artists on shirts was IN! Of course I can never be just IN....mine was CUSTOM! I wore it to a step show with my best bud Chase! I loved my Ray Charles shirt but I remember thinking at that step show how I'd rather have on a Delta Sigma Theta Shirt! Oh the Memories! LOL! I just had to wait my time before I could rock a DST shirt at a step show! Ahh and it was worth the wait:)

I digress...At first the bride was leaning towards some other photographer (Sister of a Church friend) but once I pushed to see some of this photographer's work and get some pricing for my strict budget....it all fell apart. I'm so happy it did! I would prefer to only deal with serious vendors! Excuses are tools of incompetence and looky looky...all that sketchy photographer had was excuses! She may be an awesome woman but serious photographer she is NOT and therefore she's not good enough for my clients! So now begins the fun part...Touch Studios will work the Engagement Dinner, Bridal Portraits, Wedding and Reception! Deposit down....Let's Go!



Touch Studios
























Touch Studios



Ugh...Email

Good morning Pumpkins....

I have a topic for you today! Nothing gets me upset like ignoring my emails! I encourage everyone to accept email responsibility and hold yourself accountable! A major mode of communication is EMAIL, please bring yourself up to date and respond to emails before voicemails. It is not acceptable to take longer than 48 business hours to answer emails because decisions have to be made! Just because you're a slacker doesn't mean that the planner is (in this case ME)...so ANSWER! I'm constantly working and my email comes directly to my blackberry as I am 24/7. I am never "off", but not all people share in my work ethic and for that reason 48 business hours is the only acceptable time frame I shall wait for a response. After 48 business hours I will resend the same email and preface it with "Hello, is there a status on the below email?". I definitely feel justified in doing so, makes no sense! If it were me, I would respond in one hour, three at the very most! 

Signed
~FRUSTRATED with your email etiquette

It's a Celebration....

Greetings,

Today is absolutely EPIC!!!! I'm beginning a blog for my business....TIMELESS CREATIONS BY JAY! I'm currently working a few events that I'm pretty excited about. My hope is to use this blog to not only showcase my talents but as an outlet for people to get to know me better as an event planner. Hope you enjoy....I know I will!!!!!

~Jay